Bullet Points

• 5:00 AM -- alarm clock goes off for first time. 
• 5:09 AM -- repeat
• 5:18 AM -- repeat
• 5:27 AM -- repeat 
• 5:36 AM -- repeat
• 5:45 AM --Wake up
• 5:46 AM -- begin calculations of how much longer I can sleep if I don't wash my hair. Or put on makeup. Or if I eat a handful of saltine crumbs instead of cooking breakfast. 
• 5:47 AM -- reset alarm for 6:18 AM.
• 5:48-6:15 AM -- try to go back to sleep
• 6:16 AM -- fall asleep
• 6:18 AM -- hear alarm
• 6:18-7:30 -- various activities to make me presentable for society
• 7:30-8:30 -- work in classroom and wait for students who promised to show up for tutoring
• 8:30-8:45 -- cuss those little liars in my head
• 8:45-9:45 -- 1st period: talk a kid off the emotional ledge
• 9:42-9:45 -- show kids their grades/listen to whining about their grades/feign surprise at their surprise of their terrible grades
• 9:48-10:28 -- 2nd period: 4 behavior conferences, one office referral, and 6 minutes to talk yesterday's star kid off the emotional ledge because someone stole his paper. SOMEONE STOLE HIS PAPER, BY GOD.
• 10:28-10:36 -- actual teaching in 2nd period
• 10:39-11:10 -- Advisory:Please read. For the love of all that is good and holy in the world, please read. 
• 11:13-11:55 -- PLC
• 12:00-12:15 -- Literally run into a student in the hall. I see he is in the midst of an angry cry. Reveals he's being bullied. Walk him to the counselor. Talk him through the details. Fill out an incident report. Send an email about situation. 
• 12:15-12:30 -- lunch
• 12:33-1:22 -- grade papers, do battle with copy machine
• 1:25-2:15 -- 6th period: solve tech problems on Google classroom help edit 21 papers on Google docs.  Make up songs to sing aloud about my sweet, but whiny, children. "Life is so hard..." No emotional ledges. Score. 
• 2:18-3:03 -- 7th Period: repeat 6th period, but with fewer kids. Go into someone's Google doc and make changes as they type to freak him out. Watch him freak out. 
• 3:06-3:55 -- treasure my 8th period. Except one. 
• 3:56-5:00 -- tutor
• 5:15-6:00 -- traffic
• 6:00-7:10 -- dinner with good friends
• 7:30-9:15 -- sit in a beautiful performance hall, watching one of my favorite writers test out new stories for an upcoming book. Laugh until I cry. Be thankful for good storytelling, even about fatty tumors and snapping turtles. Realize I'll never be as great of a storyteller as David Sedaris. Make peace with my shortcomings. 
• 9:30 -- head home
• 10:00 -- scoop litter boxes
• 10:01 -- reevaluate life choices